Yes! After what feels like 19 months, 713,000 hours of pointlessly televised rhetoric and 4.2 billion idiots on Twitter who don’t even live in America banging on about it as if it makes them somehow seem ‘interesting’ (hello!), the 2012 US Presidential Election Night Of Nights is here. And to mark it, the biggest ever prize giveaway that your super soaraway BrokenTV has ever seen. (Up to) FIVE THOUSAND POUNDS! And more realistically, at least one DVD boxset of the underrated US drama series The Riches (season one) starring Eddie Izzard and Minnie Driver both being way better than you’d expect them to be could be YOURS. (Terms & conditions apply.)
That’s a BRAND NEW AND SEALED copy of the above DVD box set. And it could be yours. YOURS. “Why?” you may ask. It’s because we love you, dear reader. And because we’ve accidentally bought two of them from eBay because we’re a bit thick. Our stupidity equals BIG CASH PRIZES FOR YOU*.
HOW TO WIN:
Simply take part in our super What Will Be The First Letter Of The First Word David Dimbleby Says During Tonight’s Live BBC One Coverage Of The US Election Results On BBC One At 11.35pm Tonight Sweepstake, exclusive to our Twitter followers.
Here’s the playgrid, containing the rules, current players and more information. All you need to do to enter is make sure you’re following @BrokenTV on Twitter, and have the ability to pick a letter from the alphabet. That’s it!
In addition to the lucky winner bagging the above prize, those picking certain letters CHOSEN ENTIRELY AT RANDOM BY THE BROKEN TV COMPUTER, HONEST could win up to £5000 in super top tax-free cash prizes. And if THAT weren’t simple enough, we’ve even told you what those letters are! It’s like we’re allergic to money!
So. Without any further ado, THE SWEEPSTAKE.
It really is as simple as that!
(Winner posted on Twitter and here at about 11.40pm. Or, this update removed quietly when no-one wants to take part. You MONSTERS.)
All letters now GONE, as above. The winner of our competition will be revealed LIVE ON BBC ONE AT 11.35PM.
And it’s over! With David Dimbleby opening ElectoFestUSATwoKayTwelve (which is the name that the US Senate recognises for the US Presidential Election, we believe) with the words “The White House…” (followed by some other words that we couldn’t hear over the sound of our tears and rage). This means that @alanjenson is the big winner, not only of the DVD boxset (which – BREAKING – he has just declined on Twitter, which means a rollover for 2016), but of an EXCLUSIVE BrooPeter badge, which permits the holder free access to all manner of National Trust attractions and museums. (Mainly because the EXCLUSIVE BrooPeter badge is actually just a really big gun with a safety pin stuck to it.)
Anyway, there you go. Bit of fun, wasn’t it? Apart from the bit where we realised we were recording the BBC1 Wales coverage of US Election Night 2012, which skips the first half hour due to Week In Week Out being on before it. Oh, BBC One Wales.
Anyway, we’re not bothering with a live blog this time round. Y’know, as a kind of ‘protest’ against everyone on the internet not bothering with this blog any more (hey, what do you want? Updates more than once a month?). Instead, we’ll be twattering on over on Twitter. BrokenTV are we. Will we post searing satire like “hey! Fox News aren’t that ‘Fair’ and ‘Balanced’ after all!”? It’s a slam dunk!